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I just realized I never finished the 30 day movie challenge that I fucked up so heinously months and months ago, and that’s bugging me, so I’m finishing it now. Here goes. Days 25 and 30 are missing, Idk what’s up with that.

Day 24- a movie you would recommend to anyone
Once Upon a Time in Hollywood because I’m insane. I know it’s not for everyone but that’s not gonna stop me. Otherwise? I think that Smokey and the Bandit is ridiculously easy to watch and just a damn good time, so probably that. It doesn’t hurt that Burt Reynolds is super hot in that one.

Day 26- the movie with the best plot twist
Basic bitch answer: Fight Club.

Day 27 - A movie with your favorite line
This is so tough, but I really like the the little speeches about film that Jack Conrad gives in Babylon. On the other hand, me and my family quote vacation (2015) to each other on the daily, so I think I’ve gotta put that down.

Day 28- the best movie in a genre you don’t usually like
Not a huge fan of romcoms, but City Lights goes insanely hard. If you want to watch a romcom, or get into silent films, I highly recommend it.

Day 29- a movie you haven’t seen yet, but you really want to
Masks of the Devil, which I will never be able to see because it’s a silent film. Oh tragic day :( John Gilbert looked so hot in the BTS photos too…
In terms of movies I can actually watch though? Wolfs, which just came out. I already have the feeling I’ll be writing a ton of fanfic for it. Stars Brad Pitt and George Clooney, so, like, how can I not? I also really want to watch A Countess From Hong Kong, but I’m a little weirded out by it because it’s Chaplin’s only color outing, and that just seems wrong to me.
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Fic or Treat
[community profile] ficortreat 

Whoopsitswhump's Door


DW username:  [profile] dwname[personal profile] whoopsitswhump 

Light is on for: anyone who wants to ask for something!

What's in the Bowl? Fic (probably under 600 words), book/movie/show/song recs, recipes.

Let Me Know: Wants/DNWs, specific prompts and scenarios.

Other info: I write a lot of darkfic so feel free to go ham with your requests.

Fandoms I'm offering:
•Once Upon a Time in Hollywood (and the Tarantinoverse in general, save for the Kill Bill movies because I haven't seen them yet.)
•Bullet Train
•Supernatural
The Ocean's 11 Trilogy
•Babylon (2022)
•Fool's Paradise (2023)
•Trixie Belden
•Fight Club
•Bottoms
•Snatch
•The Boys
•House of Leaves
•John Dies at the End
•Marvel 616 or 1872

My ao3 [archiveofourown.org profile] The_sluttiest_ace_on_the_block and my Tumblr [tumblr.com profile] whoopsitswhump so you can see what I'm all about.

whoopsitswhump: (Default)
Okay, fuckit, I'm going to try and write a horror movie. I've been watching a lot of stuff recently, and am feeling particularly inspired by David Lynch and Quinten Tarantino right now, so here goes a non-linear slasher mess of a screenplay. I've also still got to find a couple people willing to help me shoot a Jittlov and Melies inspired short film (more of a stop motion + effects reel) that I wrote down a while back. Anyway. Wish me luck!
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GUESS WHO'S BACK ON THEIR BULLSHIT?
It's me. I'm the one. I'm back on my bullshit and today that bullshit is none other than the Ocean's 11 franchise. I think way too much about these movies. Anyway. Onwards and upwards and I hope you enjoy my spiral into insanity. spoilers ahead.

First thing's first LITERALLY because I'm going to talk about the original movie first. Ocean's 11... 1960. The first of five. The worst of five. I hate this movie SO MUCH for so many reasons. God. Where do I even start? It is bad in every conceivable way. I'm sorry if you like it but it's just straight up not good. The acting is incredibly flat, it's racist, it's sexist, and there's no Rusty Ryan which is quite frankly a crime in my humble opinion. And! speaking of crime... I know that this is technically a heist movie, but the heist is exceedingly boring. Basically, what the movie actually is, is two hours of the rat pack dicking around and trading sexist and racist "jokes" as they play absolutely unremarkable characters.

All the guys looked the same, and for the most part I couldn't tell one from the other. Sammy Davis Jr was the singular tolerable character. One of the guys just straight up dies and we brush over it, but it was low-key tragic? Like, he only joined in the heist because he wanted to pay for his kid's college, and then he DIED and THEN all the money that was stolen got burnt to a crisp anyway??? (spoiler alert.)

The heist, as afore mentioned, was so not good. Basically, Danny and ten of his best army buddies (none of whom are Rusty--tragic) decide to rob five Vegas casinos on New Year's Eve because... actually there's no real reason. For fun? Most all of them seem pretty well off and there's literally no motivation for almost any of this. The planning makes no sense and there are too many characters just standing around doing nothing the entire time, and the actual heist scene is so fucking boring. No tension. No nothing. What the fuck. Then they decide to smuggle the money that they stole out of Vegas IN THEIR DEAD FRIEND'S COFFIN LIKE WHAT THE FUCK. And they don't even tell his wife. They literally grave rob, swap the body out for money and dump the corpse somewhere, and they are ALL IN BLACKFACE FOR THIS. What in the actual fuck.
Also, Danny was apparently oh so tragically broken up by this friend's passing, but when one of his buddies is explaining to us that Danny is sad, Danny is literally just standing like an NPC, totally nonplussed.

THEN. THEN. In the one funny part of the movie, it turns out that the dead guy's wife is getting him cremated, so all the money burns up. And "ain't that a kick in the head" is sung so many times that it made me want to kick Dean Martin in the head.
Also the directing was so goddamn static and boring. Zero out of ten. Would not watch again.

Ocean's 11 (2001) is better though. It's SO GOOD. Snappy editing, complete character overhaul, and an actually compelling heist??? They have motivations and everything??? Crazy. Danny is ACTUALLY a compelling character this go around, and, most importantly, gay icon Rusty Ryan now exists. I love him dearly <3 Every character has so much personality, even if they're more minor, and I love them all. And this is something in o12 and o13 as well, but the telepathic DannyRusty conversations make me actually insane. No notes, just cheers applauds and a fucking wonderful time. It's not often that reboots are better than the original but this knocked it out of the park and straight into space. It makes my brain buzz and I love it all so so much. I love the team dynamic and Rusty and all the planning and also Rusty and did I mention Rusty. I like him a normal amount. I'm normal about him. I'm normal about the fact that he sent Danny cookies while Danny was in in prison. 11/10

Ocean's 12 is like. A fever dream. But in a good way, you know? They give Rusty a girlfriend so people stop thinking he's gay (it didn't work), Tess pretends to be a famous actress and IT ACTUALLY WORKS, One French Guy is the bane of everyone's existence. I think this is the one where Danny wakes up in the middle of the night and forgets what time it is and then him and Rusty get wine drunk and watch TV together. They're so slay. It's all so goofy and silly and AAA. They make me insane. 12/10 (actually more like a 9/10 but I had to commit to the bit).

Ocean's 13 AKA THEE found family movie. The 2012 avengers fandom wishes they had what these guys have. It's so funny to me that Tess and that other girl are mentioned like one time and never again and Danny isn't wearing his wedding ring. Color me insane. Once again no notes, fucking impeccable 13/10 would watch again forever and ever it's the perfect finale mwah mwah mwah it's just a delight. Love and peace and hella comfort movie.

Which brings us to my mortal enemy in the form of Ocean's 8. I get why people like it but I really did not like this one. It was bad. straight up. It didn't have any of the same charm the trilogy had and the characters were too flat and boring. Also Mindy Kaling and James Cordon didn't help. That girl who played Marla was a highlight but she reminded me of my aunt and that made me a little but sad. ANYWAY. It was kind of stupid and not in a fun way. And I know it was supposed to be a girl power movie because yay women but the fact that it was actually YEN who showed up and did most of the actual theft is hilarious to me. Like, wow.
ALSO. ALSO. I take issue with the fact that Danny is dead. They didn't need to do that. It would have been really funny if Danny popped in every now and again (maybe with rusty at his side...) and it just would have made the whole thing more fun. And I take issue with the scene where Debbie goes to visit Danny's grave and REUBEN shows up. I love the character, he's awesome, but it would have made so much more sense for Rusty to be the one to show up because it's DannyAndRusty not DannyAndReuben. It makes me want to rewrite that scene with Rusty. Also I think that Lou/Debbie fell really flat in comparison to Danny. I could go on but if I did I'd be here all day.

Moral of the story is watch the trilogy u won't regret it.
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Okay. So. I'm low-key (high-key) obsessed with Fight Club right now, to the point where I've seen the movie multiple times, read the book, both graphic novels, and tracked down a copy of Make something up: stories you can't unread specifically for the Fight Club related short story Chuck snuck in there, and now I have Thoughts™ that need to escape so here we are.

FIRSTLY: you do not talk about fight club. Secondly, I'm actually going to start talking about the movie and books now.

I love the movie. It's probably my favorite out of all the Fight Club flavored media I've consumed. 11/10, I wish I hallucinated slutty gay Brad Pitt whenever I got sleep deprived. It was also my introduction to Fight Club, so maybe I'm a little biased, but whatever. It's such a well crafted movie, all the little details I've picked up on in subsequent rewatches just make me foam at the mouth, and while I am slightly bummed that Tyler and the Narrator didn't meet on a nude beach like they did in the book, I do feel like the way they introduced him was still really good, and kind of tightened up the story a bit (which is good for runtime). I also really like the voice over that they utilize throughout the movie because 1) Edward Norton's voice and 2) it keeps so many good lines from the book in. I'm also low-key obsessed with Tyler fucking around with nunchucks in the background of that one scene. You know the one. And riding a bike and crashing into stuff. He's so chaotic and goofy. And--
Okay most of the stuff he does I'm obsessed with. Extra props to the costume designers because they fucking delivered. I also really liked the Narrator's haiku phase. And the song choice for the ending scene? The last shot? Last line? Immaculate. It's an excellent movie is what I'm trying to say.

I ALSO love the book. It took me like... 10 hours, maybe less to read the whole thing. I sat down and just blew through it in about two/three sittings. All in one day. I was like a man possessed. It gave me an existential crisis worse than the movie did and I'm obsessed with the writing style. Like, the fact that the Narrator never speaks with quotation marks so we don't know if he's actually saying things out loud or if he's talking to Tyler? Very unique, took me a second to get used to, and also SUCH a choice. And the descriptions were awesome, like when the Narrator was talking about Chloe. Top tier lines right there. I love the fact that the first time they met was on a nude beach (what the heck was the Narrator doing on a nude beach???) I also liked that we got to see more of the Narrator's haikus. I need to track down a copy to actually keep because the one I read was from the library. Then I can go fully insane.

The graphic novels... are a different story. In theory, I love the idea. Tyler comes back and fucks up the Narrator and Marla's stagnant suburban life? Sign me up! I want shenanigans. But in execution, they just didn't really work for me. I liked the idea of pills and rose petals blotting out some of the speech bubbles and covering things up. That could be cool! But the actual story was so abstract that I kind of needed the speech bubbles they nixed. And that brings me to the actual story, which, like I said... way too abstract for my tastes. I thought the fact that it was a graphic novel and had a bunch of pictures would make it easier to follow... it did not. Not remotely. I really wanted to like it. I did not. The stakes felt too large, and again, abstract, when compared to the original novel. The art was alright, I enjoyed the style, but the way they drew the Narrator (or SEBASTIAN, as they call him in these books... ew) in the third book, after the whole plastic surgery thing... not for me. That whole plot actually. Was horrible. Did not enjoy.
Chloe returning? Not for me either. The Narrator and Marla having a kid together could have been more fun than it was, I thought they missed some opportunities for some truly awful parenting.
And Chuck inserting himself into the story was, honestly, so fucking pretentious. He made himself overly important and almost everything about these books seemed to clash with the original so horribly.
Not to mention Tyler coming back because "Sebastian" started taking placebo pills makes NO goddamn sense if he's a supernatural creature.

Yes, you heard that right. A supernatural creature. This is also addressed in the short story I was talking about, which was one of the worse stories in the book (that said, I did enjoy the book overall). It's short, so there's really not much for me to talk about, other than the fact that I liked the labyrinth, and it reminded me vaguely of the hallways in House of Leaves. The actual content of the story was super mediocre.

But back to Tyler being a supernatural being. A demon, if you will.

Might I say: what the fuck? Why the fuck?

One of the things that made Tyler so fascinating to me was the fact that he was purely a figment of the Narrator's imagination. An alternate personality, a tulpa, what have you. What was important to me is the fact that he is a part of the Narrator, because that makes their power dynamic so much more interesting! In the first book (and the movie), the Narrator is constantly viewing Tyler as a godlike figure, as someone who has power over him and someone who he wants to have power over him. He's in love with Tyler. That's basically canon.
And he wants Tyler to have power over him. That's canon. The fact that Tyler is a part of him that the Narrator could manipulate (like he does at the end of the movie when he realizes he's holding gun instead of Tyler, and takes the situation over from there) but that Tyler STILL has so much power over him is absolutely fascinating! But if you turn Tyler into a demon, make it so he could possess whoever he wants and do whatever he wants (hell, he could possess the president and launch a ton of nukes if he wanted to!) it just makes the whole first book seem... I don't know, almost pointless? Why possess Just Some Guy if your end goal is to cause worldwide chaos? Why not cut straight to the chase and possess someone with power? (I think he actually ends up doing that in one of the graphic novels, so like... what was everything before that for?)
Tyler as a demon who has hundreds of years in controlling people and terrorizing the masses is just boring. Tyler as a part of the Narrator who is new to existing and just kind of wants to fuck shit up? Way more fun. I'd much rather see that than whatever we got in the graphic novels.

That said... I would so watch a cinematic adaptation of the graphic novels, if only to get the chance to see the Narrator and Tyler in their 50s/early 60's. It's not a want at this point, it's a need.

Anyway! Feel free to tall me your thoughts, this is just my POV. If you've read the graphic novels and liked them, I'd love to hear your reasoning, it might help change my perspective, and very open to that because I really did want to like them.

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